I've just been on a short trip to Vienna and I had a very disturbing conversation!

I was walking around an art gallery of 11th - 16th Centuary art, not understanding any of it, and mainly concentrating on the fact that Jesus was missing a penis in every single painting ( why?). Anyway, a seemingly nice man, started to describe some important features to us (except the penis thing), before suddenly stating that he was a firm believer in alternative therapies. He then proceeded to talk for ten minutes, telling us the benefits of drinking your own urine, and trying to persuade us to try it. Having never been in a situation like this, i had no idea how to make him stop and escape, and i spent the time thinking, this guy drinks his own piss! He also spoke of the benefits of rubbing it on your skin ( I couldn't smell anything dodgy), and I have to admit, his skin did look soft.

I knew there was a reason I tried to avoid being cultured and going to art galleries!